Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Forget Friday party, how about onsite gift-wrapping

My career was in technology, but that was before companies went benefits- and perk-crazy.

Oh, we had out bennies.

I worked for two companies founded by the same guy, and which employed a lot of the same people, but at both places we had Friday Party, starting around 4 p.m. and featuring beer, wine, junk food, and – in the early days – a few joints. In one – or it may have been both – we had video games in the kitchen.

The execs at these outfits got a few more perks. I remember that there was some controversy about the president’s taxidermy bill being paid. (I never learned what was being taxidermed.)

Other places I worked were a bit stodgier, and the benefits packages tended to be the standard: health insurance, vacation days, etc.

But today’s young whippersnappers, those startup upstart Millennials want more.

With an unemployment rate of just 3.4 percent in Boston, companies are vying to stand out to prospective hires, and hold on to the people they’ve already got. But the candy buffets, beer taps, and work-from-home policies that helped companies differentiate themselves a decade ago are today unremarkable. Some employers are now dangling free Hubway bike-rental memberships, pet insurance, birthdays off, a stocked seltzer fridge, paid college coaching for your kids, free onsite gift-wrapping around the holidays, and “dream vacation” bonuses — like $7,000 on your seventh anniversary with Cogo Labs, a startup creation firm in Cambridge. (Source: Boston Globe)

Onsite gift-wrapping? Last week I wrote about consumer goods companies offering training and services to Millennials who don’t know how to mop floors. So I guess it’s no surprise that they wouldn’t know how to wrap gifts, either. Or maybe they just don’t want to. I actually enjoy the start of gift-wrapping, but, as with apple picking, it gets old fast. For apple picking, which my family only tried a couple of times (if that: it may have been once), we were all gung-ho for the first couple of apples. But by the time you picked your third Mac, it was pretty darned boring. And that bushel basket that my parents wanted filled was starting to look like a bottomless pit. And so it goes with gift-wrapping. I enjoy the first couple of gifts, but by the time I’m wrapping gift number four, I’ve about had it. And I don’t even give that many Christmas gifts. But, of course, the tedium of gift-wrapping is why God gave us gift bags. So tell me why anyone needs gift-wrapping when there are perfectly good gift bags, and perfectly good tissue paper, out there.

Other perky benefits being offered around her:

Employees at Piaggio Fast Forward, a Boston innovation center run by the maker of Vespa scooters and Moto Guzzi motorcycles, can borrow a set of wheels for a road trip. Hudl, a sports analytics startup with a Boston office, covers the cost of employee tickets to sports events. Several local companies offer in-office haircuts, manicures, and pedicures, and a few give employees free use of one of the boss’s vacation homes after a certain number of years of service.

Well, the mani-pedis sound fine, but that latter one I could live without. Maybe I’ve just got Harvey Weinstein on my brain, but I’m struggling to think of something creepier than sleeping in a senior executive’s bed, even in their absence. From  the exec’s side, would they really want employees snooping around their home-aways? Sure there are locked closets, but look what I found.

For corporate benefits, however, the big wins aren’t from offering gift-wrapping and pet insurance. It’s all about the flexibility.

“Flexibility has become the most important benefit,” says Audrey Lampert, a human resources consultant who has worked with startups and larger employers like Biogen.

That may mean time off to volunteer with a nonprofit (employees of the Needham software maker PTC get two days a year, on the company’s dime), a concierge service that can find a last-minute baby sitter, or a company-paid ride to work in a bus equipped with Wi-Fi.

One company in the article offers a four-day workweek. I had that as an off-the-books, between-me-and-my-boss benefit that last time I had a full-time corporate job. I had to call into an occasional Friday morning meeting, but other than checking email a few times, that was it. And not having to sit in traffic on 93 on Friday evening. Priceless.

Remote working is another benefit. It’s been around for a while, but it’s become more generally accepted. (Even though some companies – was it Yahoo!? – have put the kibosh on it.)

Me? I’m self-employed, so whatever perks and benefits I have are self-granted and self-funded. But I do have to say that nothing beats the flexibility. I may be sitting there on a Saturday night working on a datasheet for a client, but if I want to loll in bed on Tuesday and then go for a leisurely, 10,000 Fitbit step walk, it’s just there for the asking.

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