Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match.

On the one hand, hat's off to someone who's 84 and still looking for love.

On the other hand...

Since Bob, her long term (30 years!) partner, died eight years ago, Ellie Goldstein has been lonely. Before connecting with Bob, Ellie was married an unspecified number of "several times" - all the marriages ended, alas, in divorce - so she's used to having a man around.

I get that. 

Things can get lonely, especially if you're used to being a relationship. (Personally, I very rarely - maybe never - feel lonely, but maybe that's just me being me. I liked being in a relationship, but I come from a long line of widows, so I definitely get the ropes. But ask me how I feel a decade from now.)

Anyway, rather than sit around feeling sorry for herself, Ellie Goldstein - who's still living independently, by the way - found herself a matchmaking service:

She filled out a questionnaire and made an appointment for a face-to-face session with Michelle, one of the matchmakers at The Matchmaking Company in Burlington.

Goldstein told Michelle she wanted to meet someone about her own age. They did not discuss the availability of men in her age bracket. As the session drew to a close, Michelle told her the price for four “introductions” was “thirty-nine ninety-five.” (Source: Boston Globe)

Understandably, Ellie interpreted that figure as $39.95. 

Oops. Michelle was talking $3,995. 

When Ellie gulped and told Michelle that was just a bit more than she wanted to spend, Little Miss Matchmaker went into hard sell mode and convinced Ellie that signing up would be a life changer that would dispel loneliness from her life. 

So Ellie charged the full amount and signed a contract that was "non-cancelable and non-refundable." She even initialed the para about the cancellation policy. But by the time she got back home, she had second thoughts. She called The Matchmaking Company to see if she could back out and left a message. But she didn't get any response. The following day, after a series of calls, someone did answer the phone and told her that non-cancelable, non-refundable meant exactly that. 

Ellie admits that she should have just walked out when she found out what the cost was. But here was Michelle sweet talking here, preying on her loneliness. "I was easily convinced because I was so lonely," Ellie says. 

Ellie, by the way, is totally with it. 

Goldstein is a retired bookkeeper who still does taxes for family and friends. She drives and manages her finances and uses the internet and keeps a spotless condo, with Bob’s framed picture sitting on a box containing his ashes in the living room.

So the matchmakers weren't taking advantage of a senile little old lady.

Still...

Ellie jumped into action. She contacted her credit card company. She contacted the state's AG. One of her sons got into the act, threatening to sue.  

So far, no dice. After all, she's not senile and she initialed the para on contract cancellation.

Still...

After all, at Ellie's age - and presumably at the age of any partner she'd be interested in - the likelihood of finding someone is pretty slim.

Among those age 75-84, for every 100 men there are nearly 150 women, and among those age >/=85, for every 100 men there are nearly 220 women. (This is a 2005 source from the National Library of Medicine, but presumably the odds aren't improving with age.)

The Globe ombudsman, whom Ellie appealed to, appealed to The Matchmaking Company, pointing out that Ellie hadn't used any services yet, and asking whether a full refund might be in order.

Mike Carroll, who's a Matchmaking VP, working at company HQ in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma, pushed back, claiming that "client acquisition costs" are $2,800 per new client.

“Giving a full refund wouldn’t be fair to me,” he said. “I spent money upfront with good intentions.”

Now I don't know how many months worth of matchmaking that $3,995 was going to get Ellie, but I'm guessing at least a year. And if the service is any good, they should be able to set her up with a match in that time. So if the full expected contract value is one year - and, frankly, at 84, how many years would one expect the contract to last; I'd think by 85, someone would be really tired of dating - then I'm going to go out on a marketing limb and say that if the acquisition costs for a $4K contract are $2.8K, The Matchmaking Company spends way too much on client acquisition. Either that or those acquisition costs have been rounded up a bit. Just sayin'.

Anyway, Carroll did offer to refund Ellie $1,200, since he spent so much upfront money with such good intentions, and just couldn't go out of pocket for a fully refund.

Since there's no cooling off period for dating services in Massachusetts - looks like there should be! - the ombudsman suggested that Ellie take the offer. But she's not backing down. Yet.

You'd think that The Matchmaking Company would give her the full amount, given that it sure seems as if - however within the bounds of legality they were operating - the company took advantage of a lonely old lady. The service might have been worth $39.95 to her, but $2,800??? That's just a screw job.

Me? I'm just happy I'm content with things as they are. 

Anyway, there has been an update to the story. The Matchmaking Company is still digging its heels in on the refund; so is Ellie: she wants he full $3,995 back. 

Bonus points that the story attracted a few potential suitors. Four swains have reached out to Ellie, and she's already had a date with one, a 93 year old named Arthur. She hopes to see him again, but is just happy to be back in the swing of things. And she may well end up getting her money's worth out of her investment in the dating service.