Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Fortune's dumbest business moments of 2008

Once again, Fortune has come up with a list of 2008's dumbest moments in business.

For the most part, they weren't all that amusing. Maybe that's because, business-wise, 2008 just wasn't as out and out mirth-inspiring as it may have been in the past.

Quite a few of the moments were, not surprisingly, bailout- or politically-related. One that I particularly liked was the hard to forgive and forget incident when the execs from the incredibly shrinking "Big 3" flew from Detroit to Washington DC in separate corporate jets. (Did they fear they'd be accused of collusion if they threw in together and just took one private jet?)

Another bailout goody was the nod to the pork barrel lard ons packed into the bailout bill. One such item larded on removed a 39 cent tax on toy arrows. Now, it's entirely possible that this was a bad tax that should have been done away with. But the fact that the bailout bill had to be sweetened with picayune earmarks to get members of Congress to vote for it....Well, it may not be among the dumbest business moments of 2008, but it's certainly among the most dispiriting political moments. If you believed that the Bailout Bill was wrong philosophically, or just plain wouldn't work, then have the guts not to vote for it, please. But to use it as an opportunity to remove a 39 cent tax that was bugging some small company in your constituency? Yikes.

Somehow, I had missed Countrywide's Angelo Mozilo's getting caught out by hitting the "Reply to All" button on message he was trying to forward along. The e-mail had come from some poor schnook holding a Countrywide mortgage that he wanted some help with. Angelo passed in on, using the words "unbelievable" and "disgusting". Two words that I'm quite sure are, these days, readily associated with Mozilo himself and/or his tan.

My favorite nod for the Dumbest Moments went to something I missed entirely: the iPhone "I Am Rich" app.

German software developer Armin Heinrich created this "work of art" app, which doesn't actually do much other than, well, save your iPhone screen.  i_am_rich_iphone_appHe offered it on the Apple official download store, for the just-below-the-limit price of $999.99.

Astoundingly eight people actually went ahead and bought it.

Two of the "I Am Rich Eight" complained and got their money back (one apparently thought it was a joke), still leaving six people with way too much money on their hands if they were willing to pay $1K for a screen saver.

I'm not sure to whom Fortune is attributing thia dumbest moment to - is it the buyers, or Apple for "stocking" this item to begin with?

In any case, Apple had seller's remorse, and removed it. Given that they make a percentage of what gets sold in their online store, you'd think that they may have vetted this one more carefully. Sure, it's probably harmless and legal, but, from Apple's perspective, it didn't do anything other than make them look dumb -  dumb enough to find their way into the annual roundup of 20 Dumbest Business Moments for 2008.

As for those who bought I Am Rich, I Am No Expert when it comes to luxury purchases. Presumably, they provide folks with at least a temporary rush, and maybe even an ongoing feel good. The item may confer some sort of feeling of attainment ("I can afford a Hermès bag.") or attainment wannabe-ism ("I may not have much, but I can still carry the same Hermès bag as that ree-atch bee-atch").

But most luxury goods either have some utility (that Hermès bag can be used to hold your wallet, nailclippers, Kleenex, and Chapstick; that Rolex watch can be used to tell time) or they're experiential. (It may be worth every penny to be one of the few to experience a bungee-jump into a crevasse on the polar ice cap. Wheee.....)

But an iPhone screen saver that costs one large?

Dumb-dee-dumb-dumb.

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