Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Don't let the bedbugs bite. (Arf.)

Well, there are dogged workers, and then there are dogged workers.

And it's truly dogged workers that are walking the bedbug beat in New York City these days, which has become a mighty big beat to walk.

Thanks to global travel, bedbugs - a curse that was pretty much eradicated in the US by the 1950's - are now showing up in droves.

As reported in an article in The New York Times last week, the little devils are on the move:

Consider that six years ago, there were 537 bedbug complaints and 82 violations (in other words, verified infestations); last year, complaints topped out at nearly 11,000, with 4,084 violations cited (nearly double that of the previous year).

This is just infestations in rental units, by the way. Private buildings take care of the problem on the hush.

Well, one man's bedbug infestation is another man's opportunity, and for Jeremy Ecker, your itch to scratch has been the springboard for his new business.

Bed Bug Inspectors which boasts "New York's only independent bed bug dog inspection teams":

...was formed as the bedbug problem has made its reemergence back into our homes, offices, schools, hotels and our lives in general. We use only NESDCA* trained and certified Bed Bug Dog Teams so we can get the most accurate results for our clients - upwards of 95% on the scent of live bedbugs and viable bedbug eggs.

This compares pretty darned favorably with the human detection success rate, which maxes out at around 30%.  Not to mention that dogs are a lot faster than humans. Our four-legged friends take minutes to do what someone walking upright would spend hours on.

Increasingly, The NYT reports, those buying condos or co-ops are urged to do a bed bug inspection as routinely as they check for loose wires, soft spots in the flooring, and grot.

Which of course translates into a market for BBI that extends beyond those already suffering.

An inspection doesn't come cheap - $350 is BBI's rate for a residential sniff-fest - and inspection doesn't equal remediation. You need an exterminator for that.

But it sure sounds like those who own the bedbug dogs deserve every penny of that $350 inspection fee. Ensuring that the bedbug-sniffing pups continue to associate getting fed with finding bugs means ongoing reinforcement. So the handlers have to keep a supply of bedbugs around.  Which means care and feeding of bedbugs. Which means, well...

Remember that dinner for a bedbug is a nice long quaff of human blood; Mr. Ecker rolled up a sleeve to reveal a horrifying tattoo of old bites. (Bedbugs don’t carry disease, but their bites can itch like crazy.)

Happily, the bugs need to eat only once a month or less, he said. “It’s not so bad. You can hardly feel it.”

New York may or may not be the epicenter of the bedbuggedness, but, according to The Times article, the city established a "bedbug advisory committee" last year, and they'll be reporting out sometime next month.  That'll be an interesting read...

Bedbugs are canny little travelers, by the way. They:

...can crawl through walls and along wiring and pipes, and hitchhike on clothing, furniture, luggage and more.

Just reading this makes my scalp itch. And makes me want to bring a plastic pillowcase with me next time I stay in a hotel. Which will, no doubt, be in New York.

I wish I'd had a plastic pillowcase, not to mention a plastic body bag, when - many years ago - I took a night train in Spain.

Ay, caramba!

Buenas noches, sleep tight, don't let the chinches bite.

If only we'd had a bedbug sniffing perro with us. My traveling companion and I might have avoided a whole lot of itching going on if we'd spent the night sitting up in the smoker, rather than tossing and turning in the stifling, bedbug infested sleeper car.

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*National Entomology Scent Detection Canine Association

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