Thursday, March 04, 2021

Forever flawless. Or not.

Forever Flawless wants you to have "infinitely better skin." I have no idea what that means, but it sure sounds good. Who wouldn't want to have infinitely better everything?

Forever Flawless, however, just focuses on skin. And you can help yourself achieve infinitely better skin by purchasing one of their FDA-cleared anti-aging medical devices.

Infinitely better does not, of course, come cheap. 

For example, you can get the Eneo Advanced LED device - which actually looks like it just might be used for something else - for $7050. 


ENEO lets you target what "impurity in skin appearance" you got going: lines, wrinkles, discoloration, pore size. Using "dual wavelengths of 633 and 830 nanometers", plus "24 karat gold and detox blue light" you can turn your saggy baggy old girl skin deterioration - which happens to the best of us - around.  Plus it's easy to use - "can be performed while watching TV." The result is rejuvenation. Sounds good to me. And with the 24 karat gold light, it's no surprise it costs $7,050. And personally, I'd just as soon doom scroll through Twitter and/or do Sudoku puzzles while watching TV, but maybe that's just me. 

If you're willing to spend just a smidge more, for $35K you can treat yourself to a jar of Diamond Infused Skin Care, the titanium edition. It's for those "who like to look and feel their best." And who doesn't?

They don't give away their formula, but on their website, they generously provide the list of ingredients.

Aqua, Isopropyl Myristate, Caprylic/Capric- Triglyceride, Cetearyl Alcohol, Ceteareth-20, Glyceryl Stearate, Kaolin, Propylene Glycol, Glycerine, Titanium Dioxide, Simmondsia Chinensis (Jojoba) Seed Oil, Phenoxyethanol, Ethylhexylglycerin, Aloe Barbadensis (Leaf Juice), Imidazolidinyl Urea, Titanium Powder, Diamond Powder, Hyaluronic Acid, Serum Albumin, Fragrance, Bht, Dimethicone, Dmdm Hydantoin, Iodopropynyl Butylcarbamate, Benzyl Salicylate, Hydroxycitronellal, Linalool, Eugenol, Amyl Cinnamon, Alpha Iso Methyl Ionone, Benzyl Alcohol, Hydroxyisohexyl-3-Cyclohexene Carboxaldehyde, Benzyl Benzoate, Limonene, Hexyl Cinnamal.

Well, I have all the time in the world to play around - especially with infinite betterment at stake - but where can I get my hands on some titanium and diamond powders?

Not surprisingly, Forever Flawless was founded in Las Vegas - sun and heat can do quite a number of your skin - but is now all over the place. Their clientele includes a lot of supermodels, actresses, and celebs, but they want to reach out to us nobodies, too.

Forever Flawless’s moto [sic] is that everyone can look and feel their best and that super exclusive Diamond facials should be available not only to the rich and famous.

One of the not so rich and famous folks they touched was a local  grandmother.  

Not long after her 80th birthday last March, Patricia DeGeorge, feeling a bit old and depressed, tried to cheer herself up by window shopping at the Northshore Mall in Peabody. 
As the Everett woman walked along, a young man stepped in front of her, flashed a big smile, and offered a free sample of skin cream. He said it would help erase her wrinkles. (Source: Boston Globe)

The next thing DeGeorge knew, she was being whisked away, shown into a Forever Flawless store and well on her way to achieving infinitely better skin. And the next, next thing she knew, this not-so-rich (let alone famous) women was walking out with a light device and a bunch of creams and lotions. To the tune of over $9K.

By the time she got home, DeGeorge was experiencing a big case of buyer's remorse. The next day, when she tried to return the bag of goodies she could ill afford - unopened, unused -  she "was told the store had a strict policy against allowing refunds."

The charmingly named Benito Malool, owner of the franchise that skinned DeGeorge, claims that they rarely get complaints. Most customers are, in fact, "super happy."

But there are a couple of dozen complaints on file in Massachusetts. And some interesting "I got conned" reviews on Yelp.

DeGeorge did get a partial refund - only $2,200 - leaving her out $6,800. And she had to promise not to pursue anymore refunds in order to squeeze the paltry $2,200 out of them.

A no-refund policy is legal in Massachusetts, but it's supposed to be displayed. No surprise here, Forever Flawless's display of this bit of news wasn't exactly prominent. You really had to know where to look.

Alas, you can't protect people from their own foolishness, but as The Globe's consumer ombudsman wrote:

It’s apparent to me that Forever Flawless sometimes takes a “hard sell” approach, which is its prerogative. But denying DeGeorge a refund after she quickly realized her costly mistake seems heartless, and a crummy way to treat customers.

Caveat emptor, and all that, but Forever Flawless is so flawed, so infinitely not better than other merchants, they deserve whatever blowback they get from Patricia DeGeorge swallowing her pride and going public with her situation.

May the blowback they experience extend to infinity and beyond.

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