Wednesday, March 25, 2020

"Doctor's" orders. Or, calling in "sick".

South Carolina may not be an epicenter for COVID-19. (Or an epicenter for much of anything, for that matter.) But it's making a run for becoming the epicenter of those trying to weasel out of work with bogus coronavirus claims.

Jeffrey Travis Long was employed by Sitel, a call center. Not clear if he's someone who was manning the phones or had some other job there, but I'm sure the working in a call center is pretty darned dreadful. Whatever he was doing there, Long, who's 31 and should have a long work life ahead of him, decided to create a fake doctor's note from a VA hospital claiming that he had tested positive for COVID-19. (At least he got the number right.)

He figured that this would entitle him to a couple of weeks vacay. And now he's on a permanent vacation from Sitel, the company having fired him. It wasn't just that he was faking it - people take mental health days all the time - but that his fakery included a forged note. And was for two weeks, not the stray "I want to sleep in" day off. Not to mention that Sitel closed down the site where Long worked for five days while they sanitized the place. Oh, and, taking advantage of his ample free time during his 'sick' out, he dropped in to visit his kids at school, sending the school into a panic. And into costly disinfection mode.

Well, didn't he find himself arrested, charged with breach of the peace and forgery.

It wasn't actually the lying at work that brought Long down. Sitel apparently accepted his doctor's note as the real deal. But his kids' school contacted state authorities after they learned that Long "had" (ahem) coronavirus. Once the state started poking around, they found that the letter was a faker-ino. Not only did it lack the appropriate stamp on it, but it turns out the VA hospital where the letter supposedly came from wasn't even doing COVID-19 tests at the time. 

Not clear whether Long will do any jail time - jail would be a pretty awful place to be sheltering in place if COVID-19 breaks out there, and I wouldn't wish jail time on anyone, even a boneheaded liar-pants like Long  - but I'm guessing that a lot of potential employers will be giving him a pass when he goes looking for his next gig. 

What an a-hole...

Meanwhile, elsewhere in South Carolina, earlier in the week, one Robert William Cullum told his managers and factory workmates that his son had tested positive and, so, he was exposed.


And, of course, now he has been exposed as a fraudster, as his son isn't infected. Cullum has also been arrested, charged with breach of peace. (No doctor's letter with this incident.) When confronted, he confessed. 

I guess it's easy enough for those of us who can work from home to dismiss how much scarier this must all be for those who have to go into work in person. Many of those who can't work from home are also those without paid time off, sick leave, cash reserves. The other day, I was in CVS and had to use a human checkout person rather than self-checkout, as the isopropyl alcohol was behind the counter  and I had to ask for it. (I was able to get a quart bottle, so now I can make myself a batch of spray sanitizer). I chatted with the clerk for a bit about her work. She's in a tough spot -  in her early sixties, living with her parents in their eighties - and wonders how much longer she can come into work, knowing that she may be putting her parents at risk by doing so. How tempting it must be to try to lie your way into a bit of time off. 

Still, there's really no excuse to go to lying extremes. Cullum used his BS excuse to get out of trouble for having skipped work. Long went out of his cagy old way to create a fake doctor's note. 

There'll be plenty more of this to come, and I'm sure that there's been plenty of it happening in other places. Just kind of interesting that the first two that popped up on my screen were from South Carolina. Guess that's what I get for an occasional glance at the Daily Mail.  

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