Me chakra, su chakra?

Chakra is one of those words I've seen a whole bunch of times, without knowing - other in the vaguest of ways - just what it means. Something vaguely New Age-y. Something vaguely spiritual. Something vaguely Eastern. Something vaguely "just chant in the name of the Lord and you'll be free"-ish. 

But then I saw a Boston Globe headline that read "Crystals, cards, and chakra bowls: Psychic businesses boom during the pandemic."

Crystals, okay. Not that I'm a user, but at least I get what a crystal is. 

Cards I get. I may even have a Tarot deck around here somewhere. Not to mention a Ouija board.

But chakra bowls? That was a new one. 

So I had to look up both chakra and chakra bowls. 

Perhaps because I'm too non-spiritual and shallow, the definitions I found of chakra didn't exactly make it crystal clear. But I guess a chakra is an energy point - whatever that means - in the body, and there are seven of them. Each is associated with some property or other. If I've got this right, it looks like my main chakra - if there is such a thang - is the Throat Chakra, associated with Communications. There are also associations with physical and emotional well-being. 

But what do I know? When it comes to such spiritual matters, I'm no smarter than the average bear. I mean, I don't even know Yogi Maharishi Mahesh from Yogi Berra. 

I did glean that you want to keep all your chakras in free-flowing harmony. And that sometimes you need to unblock those chakras. 

There are a number of different ways to unblock: chanting a mantra, striking a yoga pose or two, playing around with essential oils, or using a chakra bowl.

There's a different colored bowl associated with each chakra point. You - or your yogi or spiritual facilitator or significant chakra-ish other - uses that little tapper to unblock the stuffed up chakra that's holding you back. As it turns out, the color for the Throat/Communications chakra is blue, which, as it happens, is my favorite color. So maybe there really is something to this chakra stuff. (Never say never.)

Equipped with my new found knowledge, I now felt ready to delve into the article on how the psychic biz is thriving, thanks to covid. 

The COVID-19 pandemic breathed new life into the industry of “alternative spirituality,” where customers rely on readings and reiki-charged candles for guidance. Businesses sprinkled around Boston are experiencing a spike in interest and revenue that has yet to taper out.

Crowds flock to Open Doors, an eclectic Braintree storefront stuffed with chakra bowls, lion statuettes, and images of Egyptian deities. Open Doors has 18 readers, who saw 25 percent more business over the past 12 months than in prepandemic days, said owner Richard Lanza. Products that can be lumped into “all things metaphysical” are up 40 percent, too, as are books on Buddhism, Christianity, and the nature-based pagan religion of Wicca.

“We’ve all gone through a period of uncertainty financially, health-wise, and career-wise,” Lanza added. “People are reevaluating what their life is about, and they’re looking for answers and insight.”

Owners of four other spiritual reading businesses who spoke to the Globe said the same. When the pandemic first hit, people felt their lives upended. Millions stopped going out and reprioritized wellness over work. Stress and uncertainty drove unprecedented levels of mental illness, addiction, and suicide. But without “normal” life to lean on, many turned to a different method of coping: the supernatural. (Source: Boston Globe)

Stress. Boredom. Man's search for meaning. Woman's search for meaning, too. All triggered more interest in things spiritual.

Just not in me.

Not that the pandemic didn't trigger anything in me.

For one thing, it triggered eating a lot more chocolate, which sent my glucose level into the stratosphere. 

I thought that it would trigger me to get all sorts of things taken care of. Clean out all my junk drawers. Get more reading done. Finish my novel. 

I did manage to clean out some clothing and books, which I Ubered over to Goodwill. But my reading was, pathetically, focused way too much on making myself nuts reading the screeches on Twitter. And I do have a few more chapters of my novel to show for the shutdown, but it really should be completed and knocked into shape by now. (Not that there's any compelling reason to finish it...)

This all suggests that my chakras are plenty stuck. Maybe I should get some bowls to tap on. Or lay in a supply of:

...colorful stones like moldavite, which [Open Door's Richard] Lanza said can "clear away the debris” and “set the stage for new possibilities" in life. (Anita Jackson, a longtime Open Doors employee, said that whenever the virus surges, there is particular interest in the anxiety relief and luck manifestation crystal kits.) Others choose affirmations, incense, oracle decks, and herbs like golden seal root, devil’s claw, or sage. If that’s not enough, there are spell mixes and gemstone rings.

Gemstones? Righteous! 

Then there are readers: psychics, mediums, and tarot card interpreters. 

There's also something called an "angel intuitive," who puts you in touch, I guess, with your guardian angel, and maybe some of the other types of angels out there.

Did we actually learn in grammar school that there are a lot of different angel types: Seraphim, Cherubim, Thrones, Dominations, Principalities, Powers, Virtues, Archangels, Angels. Yes, I believe we did. Did child-me actually recite the Guardian Angel Prayer (“Angel of God, my guardian dear, to whom God's love commits me here. Ever this day be at my side, to light, to guard, to rule, to guide. Amen.”)?  Why yes, yes I did. Maybe not in over 60 years, but I didn't have to look it up. 

These days, none of this stuff is exactly my jam. I don't think I'll be calling on the services of an "angel intuitive." I don't think I'll ever be buying "a Bulgarian UV light necklace," which one guy mentioned in the article had purchased, either. But I'm happy to see that some small businesses are thriving. 

And whatever gets you through the night (and day). It's a tough world out there (and in here). We all need all the help we can get. So I'm not discounting psychic-y stuff entirely. I'll give the novel a couple more months, and if nothing's doing, I may order some chakra bowls on Etsy and start unblocking.