Polly want a lawsuit? Polly want a lawsuit?

Well, our love affair with gigantic banks is never going to get old, is it?

The latest smooch to an American home-owner was delivered by Bank of America to one Angela Iannelli of Gibsonia Pennsylvania. And this was no chaste peck on the cheek.

No, this was hot-lips all the way.

To show their appreciation of Ms. Iannelli as a mortgagee, they dispatched a local contractor to her house to show her some love. (Source: Wall Street Journal.)

Because she had missed one payment - which she caught up on shortly - Iannelli's name made it on to a BofA repo list.

While Iannelli - a working woman who owns a diner and tends bar - was away, BofA's errand boy made his way into her house:

...cut off utilities, padlocked the door and confiscated her pet parrot, Luke.

Not that she was thrilled to come home and find that, not only was she locked out, but that:

...the contractor stopped utility services, cut water lines and electrical wiring, damaged flooring and finishings, poured antifreeze into sinks and toilets...

But the worst of it was that someone had made off with Luke.

It took Iannelli over a week to reunite with her pet (she had to drive 160 miles round trip to do so, thank you), and suffered considerable distress over the incident.  As one can imagine.

The bank has admitted that it made an error in siccing the contractor on Iannelli, given that she hadn't defaulted.  But not before they denied any knowledge of what had happened to her parrot. (It was with the contractor.) Nor before, Ms. Iannelli claims, a bank rep:

...told her they were "tired" of hearing from her, hung up on her and advised her to seek help from the police.

Now, I'm sure the lowly bank rep taking calls from Ms. Iannelli may have been ill-equipped to handle the agitation on the other end of the line. And was no doubt thinking, 'this ain't worth what they pay me.'

But surely, in this age of default-o-rama, there should be some training provided about how to deal with the evicted - whether legitimately evicted or, as in the case of Ms. Iannelli, through a bank mistake. Maybe an escalation policy that shipped these calls up the line a bit. (It probably wouldn't hurt the BofA executive team to spend a day with headphones on in a call center.)

As for the contractor, didn't he notice that the house was occupado? Which kinda-sorta should have been obvious, no? I mean, what would it have taken to look in the fridge, check the dates on the People on the coffee table, or, gee, notice that there was an obviously well cared for pet in residence.

I'm not a big "sue the bastards" kind of guy. (Nor am I a big bird lover, for that matter. But a pet's a pet.)

But it's completely understandable to find that Iannelli is suing Bank of America.

She's looking for over $50K, but the amount will be set by a jury if this goes to trial.

Hmmmmm.

A jury of Ms. Iannelli's peers, deciding whether a local diner owner in western Pennsylvania whose house was mistakenly  tossed and whose pet was parrot-napped, deserves a bit of pay back from Bank of America?

Hmmmmm.

I don't think this case will ever get its day in court.

I do believe that Bank of America will be settling this one, and fast.

How about they pay off Ms.Iannelli's mortgage for her? And maybe throw in a little extra for her troubles.

While they're at it, why not a lifetime supply of Saltines for Luke?