Bench Clearing Brawl

I was at the Red Sox game the other night - my first of the year. Sox beat Tampa Bay, wresting possession of first place from the Rays. A fun game.

There was a small contretemps, in which a Rays' shortstop, Jason Bartlett, tried to (illegally) block Coco Crisp's slide into second - a couple of innings after which Coco retaliated with a football-style take out of second baseman Akinori Iwamura. (He said later that he thought he was taking out Bartlett.)

There was a bit more jawing during the game between Coco and the Rays' manager, Joe Madden.

But that was about it.

Walking home from Fenway after the Red Sox win, I told my sister Trish that I'd almost been hoping or a bench clearing brawl.

"Tick for tack," Coco was quoted as saying in the next day's paper.

Tick for tack.

Well, the next night, there was more tick for tack, when Rays' pitcher James Shields deliberately threw at Crisp, hitting him in the leg.

Coco made a feint as if heading for first base, then charged the mound.

Shields threw a punch and missed. Crisp threw a punch and (I think) connected.

The bullpens emptied. The benches cleared.

It was good, old fashioned bench clearing brawl.

In the aftermath, 8 players (3 Red Sox, 5 Rays) received suspensions and fines.

The word on both side was that there was a "lot of testosterone" out there.

We can expect more tick for tack - which I actually am starting to prefer to the "correct" version of tit for tat, which the principals have reverted to - when the Red Sox play the Rays next month in Tampa.

While the site of 50 grown men pushing, shoving, grabbing, punching, holding back, holding down, separating combatants, flailing around, milling around, etc. - while 37,000+ people cheer and boo from the stands - can hardly be described as the best that sport has to offer, I found the entire scene somewhat bracing, exhilarating, even.

The guys actually looked like they were having, well, fun.

And it made me think of all the political subterfuge, backstabbing, sneaky-pete-ing, power plays, attempted coups, etc., I'd been witness to (and occasionally part of) during all those years working full time in largely dysfunctional technology companies. If only we'd had a few knock-down, drag-out fights we may have been better off.

I say this, although on the rare occasions when I saw a show of any sort of violence at work I was completely taken aback and shocked.

In one case, a colleague was more-than-annoyed that we'd hired someone that he'd recommended against.

To show just how furious he was, he put his fist through a wall in the corridor.

We didn't have time to get the wall fixed before our new hire showed up, so we just hung a picture over it.

The new hire - who turned out to be GREAT hire -  became one of my closest work friends. The man with the iron fist went on to become president of a small tech company, and today holds a very senior position in his firm.

In another situation, I was at a meeting with a new client who was the going to be the lead on a major IT project. Unfortunately, he had recommended another vendor, and had been overruled. And, boy, was he ever pissed.

Our kick-off meeting was extremely tense.

At the end the day, a wonderful, talented young woman in my group - the project manager on our side - took out her yellow pad and said, let's take down the next steps.

The client - a rather large man - leaned across the table, grabbed the top sheet off of Susan's pad, crumpled it up, and hurled it at her.

We all sat there in dazed shock for a moment.

The client apologized at once.

The air was cleared.

We went about our business - and "he" was never gave us any trouble again.

Thankfully, that's been about it for violence in my workplace.

But the bench clearing brawl did make me think of the final showdown at my last place of full time work.

I was not a direct combatant, but I wasn't exactly a civilian, either.

Let's just say I was behind the front-lines, supporting my manager.

It was an interesting power struggle, that went on for a couple of months in the wake of an acquisition in which the acquired company managed to gain enough allies to stage a coup.

Their side won; our side lost. Along with several close colleagues (who are also friends), I was collateral damage. As, of course, was my manager.

Everything had become so disgustingly political, I was just delighted to be gone.

Over the next month or so, pretty much all of the senior managers on "our side" were kayo'd.

Interestingly, the sides broke down according to height.

In "their" corner: pretty much all the short men in senior management.

In "our" corner: pretty much all the tall men in senior management.

(The one woman in senior management had already been displaced.)

If there'd been a bench clearing brawl, which side would have won?

Would the tall guys have thumped the short guys?

Would the short guys have prevailed despite their lack of stature - if only because they were willing to throw more sucker punches.

Speaking of sucker punches, it was a punchless sucker punch that had decided the winners in this battle.

The head of sales (on "their" side) - leader of the short-guy coup -  won because he convinced the also short-guy CEO that he was going to put some mighty big numbers on the board.

"Our" side had been more cautious.

But he who promised the glittery object won.

Needless to say, that glittery object turned into fool's gold.

Six month later, the short guy VP of sales was fired.

But that was well after I'd left.

The couple of months leading up to the coup were really lousy.

At every meeting you went to, you were aware of the undercurrent, the veiled glances. Rumors flew widely and wildly. It got so it was impossible to get anything done - especially if you needed anyone on the other side to help you with it. A lot of good ideas that could have helped the company got trashed in the process. I'm only thinking of the ideas on "our" side, but I suppose that some of the ideas on "their" side got a little beaten up as well.

Maybe if they'd just had a bench clearing brawl to begin with, we could have just gotten done with it.