Kidulting? I'm here for it!

Well, yesterday was a BIG ONE. Seventy-five. Gulp. No getting around it, I'm old. Make that OLD. 

Or am I?

Wondering when, exactly, old age starts, I thought I'd google around and found that "the general consensus seems to be that you are officially “old” somewhere in your mid-70s." So I guess I am, in fact, old. The mid-70s tracks with the average life expectancy of 80 and change for American women - which, now that I'm just a hop-skip-and-a-jump away, seems pretty damned young. Even though in my heart of heart, my brain of brains, I know that it's actually old. 

Interesting but not surprising that, as people get old, "their perception of when old age starts began to shift upward." Based on a German study (the one that gave us the mid-70s consensus):

"For a 64 year old, the estimated perceived onset of old age was 74.7 years,” according to the study. “Whereas for a 74 year old, the estimated perceived onset of old age was 76.8 years.” (Source: KSBY)

So nobody actually thinks of themselves as old. My mother always said you never really thought of yourself as being much older than your late 30's. Most folks I talk to feel the same. It's just that, for most of us, our bodies don't necessarily follow what our brains are telling us. There's thinking young, and actually being young. Two different things. 

Anyway, since I just observed a hallmark birthday, I was naturallyl interested in an article I came across about kidulting. 

“Kidulting” is a cultural trend that sees adults engage in pastimes traditionally considered more appropriate for children. This can include playing with toys, collecting figurines or cards, dressing up and cosplaying – anything that feels like a reversion to feel-good childhood behaviours. (Source: The New Humanist)

The focus was on Millenials and Gen Z. And, honestly, who can blame them. The existential threat of climate change. The insane price of housing. AI coming for everyoone's job except for those of the Doge Bros. Authoritarian regimes cropping up everywhere. Fuck adulting!

The rational response to me does seem to be getting out the wiffle ball set or resurrecting an old set of paper dolls.

But it's not just the youngs that are kidulting: 

As a psychologist and leading expert on nostalgia, Dr Clay Routledge recognises nostalgic thoughts and behaviour as effective coping mechanisms. “When people experience stress, anxiety, sadness, loneliness or other unpleasant mental states, nostalgic reflection helps them see a bigger picture,” he says. His work as vice president of research at the Archbridge Institute’s Human Flourishing Lab in Washington, DC has uncovered the profound impact of looking to the past on people’s mental states.

“In a survey my colleagues and I recently conducted, we found that most American adults in every age cohort view their nostalgic memories as a source of comfort, inspiration and guidance. Many of the behaviours that appear to be superficial consumer purchases may actually reflect an effort to cultivate a nostalgic environment that helps people connect with their past in constructive ways. Yes, some of it is just entertainment. But I also think it is something deeper.”

There’s also some evidence that nostalgic activities can better connect people to themselves and those around them – contributing to resilience, optimism and creativity and helping to cultivate personal progress.

Unfortunately, a lot of the things I enjoyed doing as a kid are off the table, as I don't want to break my back, head, or shoulders in pursuit of sledding or swinging or jumping rope.

And playing jacks - other than reading, my all-time favorite childhood pasttime? 

Well, a few years back, I did get myself a set of jacks. Alas, my hands and fingers were really too big for the delicate litte picks and sweeps that I could maneuver with ease and excellence as a seven-year-old. Not to mention that there was no one here to help me up off the floor.

One aspect of kidulting does hold a lot of appeal, and that's re-reading some of the books I adored as a child.

I don't usual re-read something I've already read, but I've been making my way through the Betsy-Tacy-Tib books by Maud Hart Lovelace. 

Admittedly, I took up these books because I knew that they would help me hit - and even exceed - my 2024 goal of averaging one book a week. God knows I'll never return to my childhood book-a-day pace, but settling on just one book a week is pretty pathetic, given that well into adulthood - probably up to the incursion of the Internet and smartphones into my life - I had averaged 2-3 books a week for decades. Still, I'll take the book a week, thank you. 

Anyway, in the late 1890s-early 1900s, Betsy Ray, Tacy Kelly, and Tib Muller are besties, living a pretty idyllic life, in the town of Deep Valley, Minnesota, and in the series we follow the girls from early childhood, through high school, up until Betsy's wedding. 

(It's no accident that Deep Valley is based on Mankato, Minnesota, where Tim Walz - the man we were nearly fortunate enough to have as our VP - taught school. Tim Walz is a character straight out of Betsy-Tacy-Tib.)

Just as I adored these books as a little girl, I loved them this time around. 

I'm not going to do a book(s) review, but let's leave it at these are charming and lively without being cloying and simpering in any way. And they opened up a new world I could imagine living in. Although they girls were well before my time, I could identify with them.

Tib, like me, was a blue-eyed blonde from a German family. And Tacy - in a world of childhood books were almost all the characters attended a bland, generic Protestant church - was, like me, an Irish Catholic. And Betsy, like me, wanted to be a writer.(Unfortunately, I was not as determined as Betsy Ray to become a writer, although I did eventually manage to stumble my way into some semblance of writerhood. 

I still love reading multiple books in which the same characters occur. (Thank you, Elizabeth Strout.) And while I might take another look at the Little House books, I'm not going to substitute the books I read as a child for my adult reading. I read an awful lot of pap as a kid, and there's no way I'm going to forego reading Claire Keegan or Colson Whitehead to spend anytime with the Cherry Ames (nurse) books or Donna Parker on Her Own. 

Still, it's been plenty of fun - and a great escape from today's realities - to curl up with Betsy, Tacy, and Tib. 

And forget, just for a second or two, that - yikes! - I'm OLD!