A not so great imposter

As a kid, I was fascinated by the story of Ferdinand Demara, a.k.a. "The Great Imposter." 

Among his many exploits, Demara impersonated a monk (several times), a psychologist (he worked as a college psychology
instructor), and a surgeon, in which role he served in the Canadian Navy during the Korean War and successfully operated on a number of the wounded. (Tony Curtis impersonated Demara in the 1961 movie recounting his exploits.)

I hadn't thought about Demara in years - probably not in the twenty years since I watched Leonardo DiCaprio in "Catch Me If You Can," the saga of yet another pretty great impostor, Frank Abegnale. Among his other "gigs," Abegnale faked being a doctor, as imposters often do, and faked being a Pan Am pilot. 

Demara (and Abegnale) came to mind when I read about Robert Edward Golden, who was recently apprehended in Portland, Oregon for impersonating a Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) agent.

If someone were going to impersonate a DEA agent, the "normal" thing to do, of course, would be to roust guys with drugs and take off with the money and the drugs. Although you might get into some hot water if you messed with a drug kingpin, it seems to me that you could get away with playing this game for a while. After all, the guys with the drugs and the money aren't exactly likely to call the police and say 'I wuz robbed.' 

But, no, Golden -  with his silver Dodge Charger souped up with red and blue lights, and his "DEA POLICE" tactical vest, and his fake credentials, and his rubber-ball-shooting/looks real weaponry, and his handcuffs - was pretending to be training someone to be a DEA agent. 

In a criminal complaint filed Thursday, federal prosecutors allege that Golden was impersonating a special agent with the Drug Enforcement Administration and, over the past year, duped an unsuspecting woman into thinking she was “in fact in training to be a DEA agent.”

“Golden said he and [the woman] were into ‘cosplay’ (costume play) and that is why they had the police tactical vests with DEA/Police patches” and other fake items, according to the affidavit. (Source: WaPo)

Turns out it was some elaborate cosplay, and he was the one into it, not the dupe who actually thought she was being trained. 

To help convince the woman that she was a DEA agent trainee, Golden gave her a badge, took her on nighttime surveillance ride-alongs and accompanied her to shooting practice, court documents say. He also allegedly brought her to meet homeless people so they could form relationships and be used as potential informants.

I can't imagine how credulous and brain dead this woman was that she thought that this was the normal, legit path to becoming a DEA agent. Someone clearly not bright enough to be a DEA agent. And where and how did they find each other? Craigslist? In a bar? (Great pickup line: hey, baby, would you like to be a fed?) Ah, well, at least she got some shooting practice out of it, and made friends with some homeless folks. That, and, thanks to those red and blue lights - purchased, along with the other fake paraphernalia, online - getting to zip through traffic. Wheeeee.....

Court documents show Golden was released to await trial after agreeing to several conditions, including counseling, mental health evaluations and random drug tests. If convicted, he faces a fine and up to three years in federal prison.

Unless evidence of actual real-fake drug stops emerges, I don't imagine that Golden will do any prison time. I do hope he gets the mental health counseling - and comes up with a simpler cosplay. Whatever happened to dressing up like Batman and visiting sick kids in hospitals? Guess that's so pre-covid.

Wonder what Ferdinand Demara would make of all this. I suspect he'd consider it rank amateur hour.