Call for Philip Morris

My childhood was studded with memorable TV ads, most of which continue to stud my brain all these many decades removed. Anyone my age will be able to fill in plenty of blanks, which we could all do as a call and response.  

"Winston tastes good..."

    "...like a cigarette should."

"Take a puff..."

    "...it's springtime." (That would be Salem.)

"Switch from hots..."

    "...to Kools."

"I'd walk a mile..."

    "...for a Camel."

And, of course,

"Call for..."

    "...Philip Morris."

In which ad a midget bellboy roamed around a hotel lobby paging Philip Morris. There was, of course, no Philip Morris. What Johnny Roventini - the actor playing the bellboy - was calling for was, of course, a pack of smokes.

My childhood was the last great era of cigarettes. Once I was in my teens, and the Surgeon General's Report on Smoking came out in 1964, the jig was up - or starting to up. A few years later, cigarette ads were banned from TV. 

But 'til then, some of the most iconic and memorable ads of the era were for cigarettes. And cigarettes were a big part of everyone's scenery. 

As kids, we played with candy cigarettes - or cardboard tubes filled with talcum powder - pretending we were smoking. Most adult men smoked, as did many women. (My mother did not smoke. My father did, but stopped when I was in my early teens.) When company came over, the house was full of smoke. For Christmas, I might give my father a beanbag ashtray. Or go in for the "dad gift" with my sister Kath and spring for a carton on Marlboros, which probably cost a buck. 

But even pre-Surgeon General, everyone kind of/sort of knew that smoking was bad. The mother of one of my closest friends died of lung cancer when we were 12. And we knew it was associated with her heavy smoking. Ditto another woman in our neighborhood - a mother of six - whose oldest child (and only daughter) was a year older than me. 

Over time, fewer and fewer people smoked. Take a puff? It wasn't springtime. Those puffs were drifting off. 

But even after hefty settlements based on their culpability (given that they hid critical information on the hazards of smoking and kept blithely promoting it) when it came to the illness and deaths of so many millions, the cigarette giants managed to hang on. They did so by opening up new markets in the third world, subtly - or not so - promoting cigarettes to younger folks or minority communities. And expanding into other areas.

R.J. Reynolds - Camels, Lucky Strikes - buddied up with Hawaiian Punch and Nabisco ("Yo, ho, ho for an Oreo.").

Lorrillard - Old Golds, Newports, Kents  ("I'd rather fight than switch.") - branched out into the adjacent e-cigs before getting scooped up by RJR. 

Philip Morris - Marlboros, Larks - has done a lot with cigarette-adjacent products over the years, and positions itself as going smoke-free:

We’ve built the world’s most successful cigarette company, with the world’s most popular and iconic brands. Now we’ve made the decision to go smoke-free.

We are building PMI’s future on smoke-free products that—while not risk-free—are a far better choice than cigarette smoking.

Indeed, our vision—shared by all at PMI—is that these products will one day replace cigarettes.
We are doing this because we should …

And now, quite astonishingly, Philip Morris is getting into the healthcare biz, with an agreement to buy a UK company that makes breathing inhalers. Inhalers? Talk about vertical integration. Breathtaking!

Philip Morris said Friday's move was part of its expansion "beyond tobacco and nicotine" and into "a broader healthcare and wellness company".

The group had in February identified respiratory drug delivery as a key focus, under broader plans to generate at least $1.0 billion in annual net revenues from nicotine-free products by 2025.

Since 2008, the cigarette giant has invested more than $8.0 billion in smoke-free products, "with the aim of disrupting its own traditional business", the statement added. (Source: The Economic Times)

Well, better to disrupt your traditional business than have another organization do the deed. Still:

AJ Bell investment director Russ Mould said "there seems to be an element of poacher turned gamekeeper for Philip Morris".

Poacher-turned-gamekeeper Philip Morris is making another "healthy" move, announcing a plan to acquire Fertin Pharma:

Fertin Pharma products include chewing gums, tablets and powders that are used for pharmaceutical- and nutraceutical applications and helps people quit harmful cigarette smoking. (Source: Reuters)

As Philip Morris says:

We’re clear in our message: If you don’t smoke, don’t start. If you smoke, quit. If you don’t quit, change.

In the 1920's, the tag line for Chesterfield (a Philip Morris brand) was "Blow some my way." And the cynical me is thinking, Moving into healthcare? Well, blow some my way.

But mostly, I wish them well(ness) in this endeavor. Who better to market no smoking than the genius marketers that got so many millions upon millions hooked on smoking to begin with.