Pardon me? Trading cobras for alligators is a thing?

Other than the obvious names - Steve Bannon - and the ones obvious to political junkies - Elliot Broidy, Kwame Kilpatrick - the pardons, commutations, clemencies, whatevers in Trump's final farcical man-at-work spree were a bunch of unknowns. Some may well have been worthy of the mercies granted them. Others, as we may come to find out, may have been part of a pay-for-play scheme. But the weirdo pardon that's gaining the most attention was the one that went to Robert Bowker, apparently a friend of Trump's late brother, Robert. 

Nearly thirty years ago, Bowker was convicted of wildlife trafficking. He didn't do any time, but was on probation for a couple of years.

Bowker, of New York, pleaded guilty for his role in arranging for 22 snakes to be delivered to the Serpentarium — in an apparent swap for the same number of American alligators. Bowker had hooked up with a character named Rudy “Cobra King” Komarek, officials said. (Source: Sun Sentinel)

Certainly, the notion of a cobra for alligators exchange is plenty interesting. Who thinks, hey, I've got all these snakes on my hands, maybe I can trade them for alligators?  Personally, it's hard for me to imagine who'd want either. Snakes are right up there on my scary list. 

I don't have a ton of experience with them, mind you. Mostly the odd garter snake that showed up during my childhood. And once, up in Maine, a giant water snake came slithering around the yard of the house we were renting in Christmas Cove. Now I know they're harmless, but this was in the pre-Google days when you couldn't look things up on the fly. That snake...I can picture it now. Even more frightening than the skunk that showed up there one night when we were hanging out drinking wine...

Except for seeing them in zoos, or - once - as part of the entertainment at some business meeting I attended in Florida a million years ago, I've never seen an alligator up close and personal. But I do have an occasional worry about my cousin Ellen, who spends half the year in Sarasota, and whose gated community doesn't have the sorts of gates that prevent alligators from wandering around every once in a while. (Does duck-and-cover work, El?)

I love a New England connection, and in this story the connection is one Rudy Komarek. Now dead, Rudy K was a notorious timber rattlesnake poacher who was responsible for contributing to the decimation of the Massachusetts rattlesnake population.

On this front, I have mixed emotions. Maybe it's the Irish in me. After all, St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland, so part of my DNA is disposed toward being a non-snake person. Sure, I'm sure they do some good, environmentally speaking, but I'm not all that opposed to someone driving the rattlesnakes out of Massachusetts.

Anyway, Trump's pardon of Bowker, while weird, may be one of the more righteous ones he signed off on:

Since serving his punishment, Bowker, the pardoned man, “dedicated resources to animal conservation efforts in the intervening decades, including as a member of the Humane Society of the United States, World Wildlife Fund, and Wildlife Conservation Society,” the White House said.

Meanwhile, at least one other animal-related man who'd been hoping for a pardon was left off the list. That would be Joe Exotic, the Tiger King, who starred in a recent Netflix "reality" series. Joe is a zoo operator now doing time for animal abuse and a murder-for-hire scheme. He was supposedly so hopeful that Trump would come through for a fellow reality star that he had a limo waiting for him at the prison gates. Maybe next time.

Or maybe he's on the secret pardon list that, it is speculated, Trump took with him when he packed up and high-tailed it to Mar-a-Lago. Such a list might include himself, his children, the other Rudy (Rudy G - who claims he doesn't want or need a pardon), and - for all we know - Joe Exotic.

Time will tell.

Meanwhile, how bizarre is the idea of a cobra for alligator scheme?

The world is such a very odd place.