Land of the lost luggage

I've been most fortunate in my personal and business travels in that I've never experienced the annoyance and heartache of delayed or lost baggage. I've had screw ups in baggage claim a couple of times, but never left empty handed. I have, of course, lived vicariously through the travails of friends, family, and colleagues who have not been quite so fortunate. 

Even among those folks, I don't think I've known anyone whose bag has gone totally missing, even if the mislaid baggage put a crimp in travel plans or dressing for success on a business call. The tracking technology has improved a ton over the decades. Something that gets lost isn't all that likely to stay lost.

Still, when I'm checking a bag - something I try to avoid - I always have survival gear in my carry on: a change of underwear, an extra shirt, my toothbrush...Just in case: I WILL SURVIVE. And in my checked baggage, there is always a copy of my itinerary and full contact info.

Inevitably, of course,some baggage is lost to the ages. Especially, apparently, carry on, which the airlines don't tag and thus can't easily trace. 

For 50 years, Unclaimed Baggage has been waiting the 90 days the airlines have to hang on to unclaimed or just plain lost baggage, then transporting it to its Scottsboro, Alabama store to be sold. The store is huge, and new inventory comes in at a rate of 7,000 pieces a day. 

Unclaimed has become a major tourist destination for Alabama, and has given the town something to be known for other than the Scottsboro Boys, a group of Black teens (and a preteen: one boy was only 12) who, in the midst of the Depression, were falsely accused of raping two white girls. And convicted and sentenced to death by an all-white jury. The bottom line (and it took forever to reach it) was that all of the "boys" were eventually pardoned, and the courts ruled that all white juries aren't necessarily such a good thing.

But I digress...

What Unclaimed Baggage has is a lot of stuff. And now you don't have a schlepp to Scottsboro to paw through it. The store is celebrating its 50th anniversary by going online.

In addition to the expected assortment of items -- apparel, shoes, fine jewelry, musical instruments, sporting goods, electronics and entertainment -- shoppers will also find several specialty categories. "Luxe Finds" features a diamond tennis bracelet. "Unusual Finds" houses gems ranging from a 2016 Chicago Cubs World Series ballcap to anti-radiation boxer briefs. And in the "Weird and Wonderful" section, there's everything from a pole spear for spearfishing to Bavarian Lederhosen leather shorts and a trumpet. (Source: ABC News)

Given that they've already had something as novel as anti-radiation boxer briefs - whatever they are! aren't boxers and briefs two different modes? and what would you need anti-radiation shorts for - maybe if you're a radiologist??? - it's no surprise that we give the shout out: wait, there's more!

Incredible items purchased include a suit of armor, a 40-carat emerald, a Chinese dragon kite and a puppet created at Henson’s Creative Workshop.

Unclaimed Baggage Center (UBC) has the process down to a science. Once the bags (from airlines, as well as from train stations, bus depots, and car rental services) are unloaded from the tractor-trailers that deliver them to Scottsboro, the sorting begins:

Each individual item is considered for sale, donation, or trash. About a third gets recycled, a third is donated to various charities like The Salvation Army through the UBC's Reclaimed for Good program, and a third gets sold.

Those items deemed sellable get cleaned at the UBC's in-house dry cleaner (the largest commercial dry cleaner in Alabama). (Source: Insider)

Electronics are a biggie - mostly things that get left in the cabin - and, just so you don't worry, devices are scrubbed before they're sold. Phew! But the good stuff - which is sold at 20% to 50% of price - goes fast. Pretty much every laptop available online was, well, unavailable. 

You can probably find a wedding or engagement ring there if you're interested. One time, they had a Rolex worth $60K. (Seriously, who doesn't figure out how to claim a $60K Rolex). 

As happens with those flea market finds you read about (or see on Antiques Road Show) - and a friend once found an Edward Hopper throw-away oil painting for next to nothing at a Cape Cod yard sale - people sometimes luck out. That work of art snagged for $60 turns out to be worth $25K. Someone forked over $80 for a vase. That was some vase. It was valued at $18K. 

Lots of pretty intriguing items have come through UBC:

...a six-foot-tall paper mache Tinkerbell, a set of McDonald's arches, a puppet from the movie "Labyrinth," a live rattlesnake, 50 vacuum-packed frogs, a full suit of armor, an engraved headstone, and a mummified hawk dating back about 4,000 years.

Sort of like the $60K Rolex, who doesn't claim a 4,000 year old mummified hawk? And how does one forget a six-foot tall paper mache Tinkerbell?

On the other hand, I can see why no one bothered trying to retrieve that Barbie and Ken wedding keepsake ornament. In the opposite corner from Barbie and Ken:

A camera from a space shuttle was promptly returned to NASA, while a missile guidance system for a fighter jet was quickly given back to the Air Force.

Hmmm. I'd hate to have to explain to the boss that I forgot a missile guidance system in the overhead.

I won't be beating a path to Scottsboro, Alabama, anytime soon. Still, it's fun to do a bit of window shopping and see what travelers leave behind. 

Hasidic fedora. Ramones tee-shirt. Louis Vuitton side bag. Vera Wang wedding dress. 

Attention shoppers!