What's going to happen to the Macy's Day Parade?

Of all the crummy jobs I had along the way, working retail was my absolute least favorite.

When it was busy it was okay. You could chat with customers and keep on the alert for shoplifters and change scam artists. Once in a while, something exciting happened. When I worked at Filene's, Jackie Onassis came in one day. She was, of course, spotted, and had a string of shoppers chasing after her hollering "Jackie, Jackie." When I saw her, she was making a beeline past by stationery counter, determinedly heading for the nearest exit. (In case you're wondering, she was way, way, way overdressed for Filene's - in a gorgeou$ long camel coat and matching pants. And she was far more beautiful in person than she ever was - to me anyway - in pictures.)

But a lot of the time, working as a store clerk was excruciatingly dull. And let me tell you, when no one's buying, there's only so many times you can straighten up the merchandise.

Since you couldn't sit down on the job, you had to stand there like a glom. I'd always have a piece of paper and a pen on hand - it was the stationery counter, if worse came to worst...to do little made-up word puzzles (how many four letter words can you make out of Maureen Elizabeth Rogers), name the presidents (I always got out of order in the mid 1800's, after Jackson and before Lincoln), or extract the square root of my Social Security Number.)

I did holiday season stints in both Filene's and Jordans, both times in stationery, and I completely despised the work. 

But a job's a job, and for the 100,000 Macy's store employees (and for tens of thousands of home-office workers, as well) who are being furloughed now that so many of the stores are closed, losing yours - however boring - is going to be hard, especially since there aren't many employees hiring. Most brick and mortar retailers are shutting off the lights for the duration, and for some of the stores, the shutdown may be permanent.

Macy’s was already on shaky ground before the coronavirus outbreak. In February, it announced it would close 125 stores — about a fifth of its total — and lay off about 2,000 workers after a disappointing holiday season.

“Companies like Macy’s that didn’t have a lot of momentum in the first place are at the most risk,” [Mark Cohen, director of retail studies at Columbia Business School] said. “Macy’s, which was not on the brink but was heading there, is now standing at the edge of the abyss, and these types of furloughs are only going to become even more widespread.” (Source: Washington Post)

Edge of the abyss, eh? That doesn't sound too good, does it?

I've worked for companies that were on the edge of the abyss. And some that fell into the abyss. But there were never 125,000 employees about to become unemployees.

I'm no big fan of Macy's. New Yorkers may have a fondness for it, but for those of us who saw it replace and debrand the stores we grew up with (in the case of Boston, that would be Jordan Marsh, the premises now occupied by Macy's), it's just become a big old symbol of the homogenization of American life. 

Still, they do cute windows at Christmas. And what would Thanksgiving be without the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. 

With luck, we'll be back in action by next fall, but will Macy's still sponsor the parade? Will the Rockettes still do their kick line in front of the store's main entrance? Will there be enough Macy's employees to man the balloons?

If Macy's in Boston closes permanently, it wouldn't be much of a personal loss for me. I shop there occasionally, mostly for underwear and housewares and stuff like sheets and towels. But I can order my undies from Jockey - which I just did - and I can get housewares and stuff like sheets and towels at Home Goods or Bed, Bath and Beyond. Still, it would put a big hole in Boston's Downtown Crossing, which already has enough big holes. (Barnes & Noble closed their downtown Boston store in 2006, and I don't think anything's gone in there yet. At any rate, pre COVID-19, I walked by there several times a week and I can't picture what went in there if anything did.) 

But all those job losses - not just at Macy's but throughout the retail sector. More and more were gone with the wind of online shopping and self-service automation, anyway, with more of both to come. Coronavirus is just the sour cherry perched on the spoiled whipcream topping the shit sundae. 

"I don’t suspect many people are in the market for spring fashion right now,” said Cohen of Columbia Business School. “There is no telling when this is going to end."

When it comes to my shopping, Cohen is 100% right about not caring about spring fashion. Or spring anything, since I really don't do fashion. But this time of year, I'm usually buying tee-shirts, a couple of sweaters, a new pair of pants.  Maybe a new pair of sandals. Not this year. A) I don't need anything (other than those undies), and B) I don't want anything.  Except for the pandemic to end (and Trump to be gone).

And, with or without the pandemic, Cohen is 100% right about there being no telling about when this is going to end.

The Fed is now predicting that the unemployment rate could hit 32%. Gulp.

So, if and when the economy revives, what, exactly, is it that people at the lower end of the skillset continuum - and what are high school and college kids who need crummy jobs - going to do? We've proven time and again that, as a country, we excel at avoidance, but the question of where the work is may be one we can't dance around for much longer...