Poor baby

If you’re not familiar with Jacob Wohl, allow me to introduce you.

Wohl is a 21 year old far-right conspiracy theorist and troll. He’s also known for tweeting about overhearing liberals in “hipster coffee shops” raving about how great Donald Trump is. (This bit of nonsense, of course, became a meme with far more clever tweeters dragging on Wohl, who has, I believe, been banned form Twitter.)

Wohl is quite the little Trumpian go-getter. By his late teens, he’d already banned for life by the National Futures Association, and he has a couple of other securities fraud charges hanging over his head.

He’s also the co-creator (with lawyer Jack Burkman) of a series of smear campaigns that have been aimed at Robert Mueller and a bunch of Democratic politicians. Although there is one floating around about drug dealers w.r.t. Nancy Pelosi and Adam Schiff, the smears are generally about things sexual.

Not that Wohl would have any first-hand (other than first hand) knowledge there. If ever there were someone destined for ‘incel for life’ it’s this dude. Ordinarily I’d feel bad for someone like this, but in this case, Wohl has made his nasty little twin bed and deserves to lie alone in it until the end of time.

As I noted, most of the smears – all of which have been insta-debunked – are about alleged assaults (Mueller, Pete Buttigieg) and/or unseemly sex lives.

One of this recent press conferences – the venues at which Wohl and Burkman announce their “finds” – featured a ripped ex-Marine who claimed he’d been in a BDSM relationship with Elizabeth Warren. This claim was instantly discredited, including by the sexcort site Cowboys4Angels the Marine supposedly met Warren through. They put out a statement that the Marine was not up to their gigolo standards and that, in any case, Warren wasn’t a client. The Marines also issued a statement saying that the bogus Cowboy4Angels stud hadn’t – as he claimed – been in action (of the war variety) and had never received a Purple Heart. Sur-prise!

Whatever you think of Elizabeth Warren, she has a great sense of humor, and shortly after the “big reveal” she tweeted out that, as a University of Houston grad, she’s a proud cougar.

Shortly after bringing forward their bogus allegations against Warren, Wohl and company went after Kamala Harris.

To support their allegations that Harris was involved in an extra-marital affair, they trotted out one Sean/Shawn Newaldass, a would-be actor, who thought he was auditioning a role:

That’s because Newaldass had met Wohl and Burkman by replying to an ad posted on Craigslist seeking a “male actor” for “performance art.” When he showed up at Burkman’s Virginia home and delivered his lines alleging an affair, Newaldass was under the belief that the press conference was actually an audition for a Spike TV show. He said he had no idea that Harris was a politician. Indeed, he assumed she was a fictional person.

“I thought I was acting for a role in a movie, like a role in a TV series,” Newaldass said. “I thought everything was staged, I’m thinking everyone is an actor.”

Newaldass insists that he believed that everyone at the event, from Wohl and Burkman, to the reporters asking questions, and a heckler dressed as a corncob, were all actors. Wohl promised Newaldass $500 to appear at the event—money that Newaldass said he still has yet to receive. (Source: The Daily Beast)

Oh, Sean/Shawn. You poor baby!

Sure, it’s time to get your head out of your newaldass and start paying attention to the political sitch in this country. Never heard of Kamala Harris? Thought she was a fictional character? Really?

But mostly I feel for this fellow. Lied to by the the dirty rotten scoundrel team of Wohl and Burkman, and then – of course – stiffed. Which is pretty much the MO of the entire Trump operation, so no surprise there.

One might start to believe that Wohl and Burkman are perfecting their performance art. The lines they gave Newaldass to read were positioned as a “script”, not a statement. But true to their overall ineptness:

Newaldass initially received a statement from the pair making a series of different sexual allegations against former Vice President Joe Biden — apparently because Wohl or Burkman mixed up their smears and attached the wrong file to the email. After he asked Wohl for clarification, they sent the Harris statement instead. Newaldass began to practice what he thought would be his lines.

Wonder if Newaldass was familiar with the name “Joe Biden.” Sigh.

But Wohl and Burkman kept the ruse up, “talking up [Newaldass’] future Hollywood career.

Newaldass said he left the event with promises from Burkman and Wohl for future opportunities in Hollywood, and even the prospect of an entire TV series and potentially hundreds of thousands of dollars. Newaldass began to think about how a role on a hit TV show would enable him to provide for his family financially.

“So that’s what really sucked me in, thinking, ‘Man, I can take care of everybody,’” Newaldass said.

Sure, Newaldass had been a bit confused when reporters – he thought they were actors – began asking him questions. There were no answers in the script and, apparently, he doesn’t do improv.

While Newaldass left with visions of Hollywood fame and fortune dancing in his head, by the time he got home, folks were all over his Instagram account calling him a liar.

He’s embarrassed, and he probably hasn’t moved his acting career forward all that much.

Guess he’ll have to keep his day job as a personal trainer.

Anyway, I feel bad for Newaldass. Jacob Wohl and Jack Burkman are malignant scum. I don’t know what the laws are about libeling famous people, but there really ought to be a law against hiring people to make false statements about another person. I did hear that, in the case of the attempted smear on Mueller, the FBI is looking into it.

If the smears don’t catch up with these two, maybe Wohl will finally get nabbed – as in sent to prison nabbed – on one of his security fraud charges. What a pathetic little weasel he is.

There is an upside for Kamala Harris: Newaldass now knows who she  and is leaning towards voting for her.