More of the nth degrees

Last week, I came across a piece on Fastweb on “weird-but-cool” college majors. Sure, you may already decided that it’s worth going back to school for your nth degree – this time in Bagpiping or Citrus or Bowling Alley Management. But just in case there was nothing in the first part of the list that caught your academic fancy, here goes some more of it.

Comic Art students at the Minneapolis College of Art and Design learn how to work as cartoonists or as comic book authors/illustrators. Well, you can luck out and end up with all sorts of cool, East Coast elite, brainiac cartoons in The New Yorker and become the next Roz Chast. Or you can hit comic strip paydirt and create a strip (think Dilbert or Garfield or the granddaddy of ‘em all, Peanuts) that turns into a merchandise empire. Or you can prick a lot of balloons with political cartoons. But even if you don’t strike it rich, comic artist would be a fun way to (try to) make a living. And with graphic novels – which, for the most part, I don’t enjoy; other than Maus -  becoming more popular, you never know.

If you’re at Florida Southern and you’re not interested in studying Citrus, they also offer a degree in Diving Business and Technology, where you can learn, among other things, how to deal with the bends. And if you decide to transfer to Brown from Duke, you might have to surrender your Canadian Studies degree for one in Egyptology. I’m a big believer in a liberal arts education, but I don’t think that there are many parents who’d be thrilled to write a check for $75K each year to find out that their offspring had taken a course in ancient Babylonian magic and medicine. Forget “my son the doctor”. Think “my son the ancient Babylonian medicine man.”

At the University o Nevada Las Vegas, you can study Entertainment Engineering and Design, setting you up for a career doing casino shows. I suppose if you actually wanted to live in Las Vegas, a degree that happens in Vegas may let you stay in Vegas.

Maybe I’ve been hanging around a PT clinic that specializes in the care of runners – don’t ask what I’m doing there -  for too long, but studying Exercise and Movement Sciences at UVM doesn’t sound particularly odd to me. There are a ton of folks interested in fitness and wellness, and as the Boomers get older and grayer it’ll be critical to have folks who’ve studied fitness for specific populations.

Both my grandfathers ran family businesses. For my Irish grandfather, it was the Rogers Brothers Saloon. The Saloon went out with Prohibition, and my grandfather went out shortly thereafter. (The other Rogers bro didn’t even make it to Prohibition – both died young, but at least my grandfather made it to his 40’s.) My German grandfather had a grocery store that my Uncle Jack, who was 21 when Grandpa Wolf died, somehow ended up running. (Can this be possible???) My Uncle Bob, who was 11 when my grandfather passed away also worked at the store. I remember seeing him there. Bob was 10 years older than me, so he would have been in his late teens. “The boys” turned the business into a ships chandlery, servicing merchant ships in the port of Chicago. (Got to go make a delivery with “the boys” one time. Very exciting being with my handsome uncles as they hefted cartons of supplies down the gangway.) I don’t know quite when and how that business disappeared. But I’m guessing “the boys” could have benefited from someone with a degree in Family Enterprise, a major at Stetson U that “emphasizes ‘self-awareness, family systems, utilizing family involvement as a strategic advantage and how to consult with family enterprises.’”

Before he figured out that the car would replace the horse and wised up and opened his bar, my grandfather Rogers was a blacksmith. Without the benefit of having studied Farrier Science, I might add. And he ran his saloon without the benefit of any knowledge of Fermentation Sciences and without having taken any course the covered the sensory analysis of beer.

Floral Management is a major at Mississippi State. Isn’t knowledge of “sourcing, purchasing, distributing, marketing, designing with, and selling floricultural products” – that would be flowers – the sort of stuff you used to learn on the job? Kind of like horseshoeing. And bagpiping. Is there really a need for degrees in certain professions?

Anyway, if you (or my grandfather) wanted to go beyond the horseshoe aspects of blacksmithing, Southern Illinois offers a degree in Metalsmithing/Blacksmithing. Among other things, this concentration sets you up for be an independent artist. One of my college friends dated, and later lived with, a fellow who dropped out of MIT to become a metal sculptor. He was actually pretty good, but fast forward 20 years. I ran into him at a tech conference and he’d become a software developer.

Mortuary Science sets you up for working a funeral home. Or managing the corps des corpses at a medical school. Or in other places where you deal with the deceased. If theories of embalming and disposition sounds like fun, have I got a degree program for you…

At the other end of the circle o’ life, Sullivan University (a for-profit outfit) lets you study Nannying where, among other things you learn “how to prepare nutritious meals and snacks”. This seems to me to be something that you can learn by googling “how to prepare nutritious meals and snacks.” It also offers more up-level course on child development and learning opportunities for kids. Maybe a degree in Early Childhood Education would get you the same credential without having the limiting title of a degree in Nannying.

Still haven’t found the major of your dreams? We’ll be wrapping up this highly educational series tomorrow. Perhaps you’ll find something there.