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Friday, January 31, 2014

Shiver me timbers, January’s over at last

Not that I have anything much to look forward to in February, but I, for one, am just delighted that January will end on time - but none too soon - tonight at midnight.

January is always long. January is always dark. January is always cold.

But this year it’s been longer, darker, and colder than usual.

Cheerless, relentless, and, I’m quite sure, something-else-less.

It’s not just January and its nasty and brutish cold that I’m sick of, however.

There’s plenty of other items on that list.

I am sick of Dennis Rodman, and his demented and pathetic “antics”. I know that Hugo Chavez is dead, but couldn’t Rodman have found a more benevolent despot to buddy up with?

I am sick of Vladimir Putin. No, the Olympics haven’t even started, and – blessedly – nothing’s happening in Sochi so far, but I have had it up to here with this one.  I swear I will turn off whatever obscure sport I’m watching if the camera pans on Putin’s mug for even a nano-second – unless it is a nano-second during which VP is caught reacting to some U.S. athletes having kicked some Russki arse.

I am sick of David Ortiz bitching about his contract. I luv ya, Papi, but enough is enough. If you think it’s worth leaving the Old Towne Team for a few more benjamins, rather than hanging up the spikes as a beloved, number-to-be-retired member of the Red Sox – that’s assuming that there’s any team out there willing to cough up more benjamins for you – have at it. We get it’s a business, etc., etc. And maybe it’s just not in you to give a home town discount to stay (thank you Dustin P, thank you Jon L), but you’ve still got a lucrative year on your current contract. So please, will you just shut up, get thee to spring training, and start swinging the freaking bat, why don’t you.

It goes without saying that I’m sick of Justin Bieber. Why don’t you just marry Lindsay Lohan and be done with it?

Not that things are entirely miserable.

I was absolutely amused to catch these headlines as I trudged (virtually) around the ‘net looking for a topic that was interesting enough to blog about today.

  • Schools Tussle Over Proper Training for Butlers
  • Harvard Overpaid for Timber as Romanian Agent Held for Bribery
  • Gold Horses Boost Chinese Jewelers as Bullion Slumps

I’m too January-whipped to get into any of them at this very moment, but they do hold promise for the near future. \

I know that I’ve blogged about butling schools in the past, but it may be worth a revisit. Who knows what might be new on the servant front?

That “Harvard Overpaid for Timber…” headline could turn into something. Not so much on the “Harvard Overpaid” front as on the “Romanian Agent Held for Bribery” end of things. With my Romanian connection – my mother, while German, was born there – I’m betting I could find some there there.

And as for those gold horses. If I pursue that topic, I will not even bother to read the article.

Get me a gold horse so I can ride me out of January.

Meanwhile, on the  perhaps January has a silver lining front, on Wednesday – which was bitterly cold and windy – I saw a big, fat red, red robin, bob, bob, bobbin along. This is either a truly bird-brained bird who thinks that January in New England is fun, or maybe even a sign that spring will be sprung on us sooner rather than later.

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