Pink Slip: I, fashionista

Thursday, November 11, 2010

I, fashionista

Well, I just did my winter clothing buy:

LL Bean sweater
Eddie Bauer turtlenecks
Bogs rain boots
Red Sox cap with Santa Claus on it

Then – dammit – I find out that the Wall Street Journal just had an article on the current fashion trends that us fashionistas might want to invest in.

I guess it’s my own darned fault, since I’ve been avoiding The Journal for the past week or so. I just don’t want to expose my tender eyes to a headline in which Karl Rove is gloating.

So I missed the news that Charlie Girl pants are the rage.

These are like the ones that Shelley Hack (and Bobby Short’s voice) made famous in the way back, flogging a fragrance called Charlie.

I think I have a pair of cuffed tweedy wool pants around somewhere. Sure, I’ll look more Old Lady with Charlie Horse than I will like Charlie Girl, but at least I’ll be a hip and happenin’ old lady. (Especially if I wear them with my new Bogs boots.)

Unfortunately, I did not order my winter duds in time to realize that I should be thinking “leopard” this winter. Not that LL Bean and Eddie Bauer had much leopard-ish clothing on offer. But I still may be able to take care of the fashion dictate that this season’s wardrobe include a “’touch of cat.’” I happen to have a leopard-print eye-glass cleaning cloth. And, since I’ve got it, I’m gonna flaunt it.

I’m also supposed be going minimalist, since minimalism is “huge” this year (if it can be said that minimalism is ever huge…).

It may look easy, but it's actually brilliant. It is about what you don't notice.

Minimalism? Can do! Jeans and polarfleece don’t just look easy, they are easy. Which, personally, I think is completely and utterly brilliant. And I can pretty much guarantee that if we’re supposed to attain some sort of “what you don’t notice,” there’s no better guarantee of that “don’t notice” than being a woman of a certain age buzzing around in jeans and polarfleece. Although someone may notice the Bogs boots, which have pink and purple flowers on them. (Come on, give me a break. My storm coat is black. My storm hat is black. My storm pocketbook is black. I’ll be needing a touch of color on a dreary, slushy day. That is, unless I take one look at my new Bogs, suffer buyer’s remorse, and kick them back to the nice folks at Zappo’s.)

It also looks like I’m supposed to be getting myself a little red dress and a shearling jacket.

I don’t really do red. Come to think of it, I don’t do much dress anymore, either. And I never really did little.

But a shearling jacket would be nice. Although I don’t know how it would actually look with a Maison Michel “ears” headband. Or with my faux Charlie pants, for that matter. Not that I could afford any ears, at $591. Especially if I’d invested in a shearling jacket. I’m betting, however, that I could fashion up something that looks like this with a plain old CVS head band and some pipe cleaners. I might have to do without that veiling, however.

A black fabric headband by Maison Michel with mouse-style ears. Black lace covers the wired ears and creates a veil at the front. Humorous and ultra-feminine, Maison Michel’s Heidi. Headband with Mouse Ears is ideal to wear with a shift dress for contemporary dressing. (Polyvore.)

Even though, to me, it’s really the veiling that makes this headband both humorous and ultra-feminine. And a nice about-face after last year’s year of the snood.

There was one thing on the WSJ list that I positively, absolutely want to put on mine before I declare this fall’s buying spree mission accomplished. And that’s a “small cross-body bag with a long chain handle.” This is “ladylike” (and I’m a lady that does so like to be ladylike). And in keeping with the spirit of minimalism, is definitely a “’less is more’” kind of item.

Prada Fur Spazzolato Mini Crossbody Bag $1,495

Only a complete, unladylike fashion cretin would even think the thought, let alone write it down, that this ladylike cross body bag bears any resemblance to a Furbie.

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And I’m not ignoring Veterans’ Day. Here are my posts from the last two years. The sentiments still hold. Veterans’ Day 2009 and Veterans’ Day 2008.