You've got to Accenturate the positive, eliminate the negative

It's no surprise that the golf shoes have begun to drop on Tiger Woods.

Yesterday's announcement by Accenture that they weren't going to be giving old Tiger a mulligan was pretty straightforward:

For the past six years, Accenture and Tiger Woods have had a very successful sponsorship arrangement and his achievements on the golf course have been a powerful metaphor for business success in Accenture’s advertising. However, given the circumstances of the last two weeks, after careful consideration and analysis, the company has determined that he is no longer the right representative for its advertising. Accenture said that it wishes only the best for Tiger Woods and his family.

Very circumspect, that "given the circumstances of the last two weeks," but I wouldn't expect them to state outright that one bimbo eruption after another, after another, after another, was one, or two, or three, or more bimbo eruptions too many. 

Maybe Accenture would have kept Woods on if it had been one or two babes in the woodwork. Or if his affairs of heart (or lower) had been with Accenture type women: button-down MBA's with their charcoal gray suits, horn-rimmed glasses, and briefcases. Of course, if that had been his type, we may not have seen quite so many media appearances by girls done wrong/doing wrong - waitresses, porn stars, hostesses - all trying to grab their chippie shot at 15 minutes of fame. In hopes, of course, that they can parlay it into a career, now that they've captured the media's attention. (Good luck with that, ladies.)

Giving its lineage, Accenture might be especially skittish about its reputation. (Say, didn't they used to be Andersen?????) Thus, they may have felt the need to act more quickly than others  (Nike, Gillette). 

I don't  know how and if being B2B to the Fortune 500 factors in here, either. We'll take Accenture's word for it: Tiger's no longer the "right representative" (although I can easily imagine that a lot of Fortune 500 execs would still be de-lighted to rub shoulders with Woods and golf a few Pro-Am celebrity holes with him; and, lets face it, do a little girl talkin').

Nothing new here, of course. Those with the means can always find the ways, especially when they're on the road a lot. My guess is that many a wife of a professional athlete makes a trade-off: philander globally, act upright locally. (What happens in [destination goes here], stays in [destination goes here].)

But that was before the days of 24/7 news, twitter, texting, secting, cell-cam, citizen paparazzi, and everyone feeling that, unless they're part of "it" they're nobody.

Truly, if you want to be a play-a, you're better off being the next level down: professional athlete making good money, but not the one who's on the cover of Sports Illustrated, let alone popping up in ads all over the place. No, if you want to get around, you're better off being a bit below the radar, making multi-millions a year, but not generally being recognized by anyone other than die-hard sports fans.

And, of course, if you're going to peddle a robotically squeaky-clean image as part of your package, well....best to keep it robotically squeaky clean.

What I don't get is that, in this day and age, someone so famous could actually believe that they could get away with this sort of behavior and not be outed. Basketball player Wilt Chamberlain reputedly slept with 20,000 women during his career, placing him way out of Tiger's league, lady-wise. (Certainly not endorsement-wise. Old Wilt never made any $1B.) But that was then, and this is now.

And, of course, Chamberlain is unlikely to have had much of a sustained relationship with any/many of the women he slept with. It sounds like at least some of Woods gal-pals believed they had something going, at least some degree of longevity.

So, this inquiry mind wants to know if Tiger was so arrogant that he thought he could get away with it. If he's not all that bright to begin with. If he just completely lacks judgement, in terms of the women he got involved with. (Is there anybody left out there who's capable of kissing and not telling?)

Or maybe he's just sick of the whole fraud show aspect of being the Tiger Woods that Accenture and a lot of others want him to be.

Maybe Woods has gotten what he's really wanted: out of the sham, and free to figure out who he wants to be from now on.

He certainly doesn't need the Accenture money. It will be interesting to see, over the next few years, exactly what it is that he does want and need.

File this one under one more reason I'm glad I'm not a celebrity...