That does it: Twinkies may go bankrupt

Well, yesterday's grim news wasn't just Lehman Brothers' tsouris - not to mention our collective misery when we see how much Dick Fuld, their Chief Exec, will manage to salvage in terms of his compensation this year. Last year he made forty large - which is just about half of what Interstate Bakeries is looking for ($79 million) as an additional amount needed when its current financing package expires in a couple of weeks.

According to an AP article picked up by Business Week, if Interstate doesn't get the dough, and an extension on their expired financing, they'll have to liquidate.

Interstate Bakeries has quite a brand portfolio: Wonder Bread; Hostess - Cupcakes, SnoBalls, and Twinkies; and my own personal favorite, Drakes (Yodels, Ring Dings, and Devil Dogs).

Even though it built strong bodies twelve ways, my mother never bought Wonder Bread. We got bread delivered from the Cushman Bakery truck (which also made knock-off English muffins), Nissen, or Sunbeam. Nissen and Sunbeam are also brands that have been gobbled up by Interstate along the way. As was Roman Meal - this weird health bread my mother also used to buy, I think because it was lower cal than standard gloppy white bread.

It goes without saying that we didn't have a lot of Hostess products in our house. My mother was a scratch baker, and baked nearly every day to satisfy the sweet tooth of my father and a subset of his offspring (myself included). But we did occasionally get a Hostess treat, most notably on Halloween when one of the families on the street gave out SnoBalls. (The husband delivered Continental Bakery goods, and the SnoBalls must have been day-old, or fallen off the truck.) I still remember the sheer joy of peeling off the glutinous, coconut flecked pink and white covers and eating the faux chocolate cake inside. Yummy!

I was never a major Twinkies fan - chocolate was always my game - but I didn't mind the ones that had the plasticine chocolate frosting with the white curlicues on them.

On my wander over to the Interstate website, I learned that I'd missed the Twinkies recipe contest, held a couple of years ago to celebrate Twinkies 75th anniversary.

I don't know what ended up in the "special commemorative 75th anniversary cookbook", but the call for recipes mentioned Twinkie crepes, Twinkie-misu, and Twinkie Toffee Treat. (Why do my teeth all feel as if they're being drilled by 75 little mini-drills - and I don't have any novocaine?)

Truly, the best recipe for Twinkies should be open package, remove Twinkie, take bite, discard remainder.

But I'm most alarmed that Interstate's liquidation could put the end to the Drake's Devil Dog, truly one of the premier snack cakes ever invented.

I still remember my father taking us over to Sol's Maincrest Pharmacy and buying us Devil Dogs. Or putting a nickel in my sweaty palm and letting me jog on over to Sol's and pick one up on my own.

So - all you praying types out there - say a quick one to St. Elizabeth of Hungary, one of the patron saints of bakers- and wouldn't you know it, my patron saint (my middle name's Elizabeth) and that of my mother.